Lost in Thought, Living in Words

It's weird... because it's another peaceful day. And it's too peaceful to be this peaceful. If this continues to be the normal trend, there will definitely be drama tomorrow… touch wood. Please let the rest of the month stay peaceful… PLEASE!

Lunch: 2.80 SGD

Sometimes, I wonder about the connections between humans. Everyone is so different, and for me, it's so easy to break a connection with someone if I really want to. I can simply cut them off by stopping all communication, leaving them wondering what they did wrong. But that’s a bad habit. Still, I guess the older we grow, the more we experience these things in life. Because eventually, people leave—unless they really want to stay, and you really want them to.

Everyone is an individual, complete on their own, and you can't truly belong to anyone—not even if you're married. That’s why I think connections are fragile. Someone like me, who easily lets go of people, probably needs someone who truly wants to stay in my life.

But my family will always be here, no matter how broken I am. They love me even when I don’t love myself. And I also want to credit my baby dog. Sometimes, I wonder how long it will take before he gets fed up with me. But apparently, I’m wrong—he never will. No matter where I go, he follows, even if I have nothing.

He’s such a small dog, but his love is so big. He’s the only one I can love without fearing heartbreak—because he’s worth it.

Sorry for being emotional tonight... I just miss him a lot.

throwback

I have this really bad habit of overthinking—I think about life a lot. I think about how my future will turn out, and sometimes, I worry so much about it that I forget to actually live in the present. It’s like I never truly exist because my mind is always somewhere ahead, lost in thoughts of what’s to come.

Another bad habit... Honestly, I feel like I’ve collected all the bad habits. And once they’ve been with you for a long time, they’re hard to shake off. But hey, I’m trying.

That said, I still consider myself a pretty chill and emotionally stable person when something big happens. I usually don’t show it on my face. That’s probably why I’m better at texting people—I’m funnier over the phone and even funnier when I blog. I can’t really express all these thoughts out loud in real life, but there’s so much in my head that I need to let it out.

And that’s exactly why I started this blog! I hope I’m not oversharing, but honestly, I know this place is my little corner of the internet, my secret garden. So I’ll just write and share everything here, without worry.